Wednesday, 1 April 2009

Today I am trying to read The Vampire Shrink by Lynda Hilburn. Did you notice I used the word "trying" when I mentioned reading it? I am on page 252 (there's 392 total) and I am trying (there's that word again) to come up with a reason to soldier on instead of dropping it cold. I'm not sure what exactly is turning me off; it could be Kismet (?), the aforementioned Shrink, who is surprisingly the least ridiculous character in this book. It could be Devereux, the main vampire, who is apparently infatuated with Kismet and has all the neat vampire abilities such as teleportation - between dimensions, no less - and is the vampire king or whatever. I do like Alan, who is just like Fox Mulder (his FBI buddies actually call him Mulder as Mulder's colleagues called him Spooky) and is hot on the trail of the mean vampires, aka not Devereux and his ilk. 

This book is ridiculous and yes, I am aware I've already used that word. Kismet is utterly stupefying in her resistance to believing in vampires. Even her name is stupefying. And then, there's Devereux. Utterly beautiful (if you go for girl hair on a man), he won't stay out of Kismet's head and performs a protection ritual on her in which he did a dance that did nothing but make me giggle. I had a funny yet erotic-like dance routine from Napoleon Dynamite running in my head while reading it. And he only wears leather! All the time with the leather. There's also other characters named Midnight and Emerald and it's all too much. It's definitely possible that I'm just not in the mood for this book and if I picked up some other time I might enjoy it so I'm probably going to drop it. At this point, I just don't care what happens to Kismet and Devereux. Alan, who is secure enough in his masculinity to wear pink sweats while his clothes are in the washer, could keep me interested but I don't think he's gonna win. It's hard to beat a guy who can read your mind and make you sleep with a thought. I think I'll reread Agnes and the Hitman by Jennifer Crusie. Her books are like comfort food for me.

My mood can definitely be attributed to the procedure I have to endure tomorrow morning. A procedure I didn't expect to go through until I was forty, at least. I don't think it's going to have a negative outcome but I'm worried nonetheless. Wish me luck.